Vacation Preparation

By the time vacation gets here I am going to be too exhausted - or insane - to enjoy it.

Today I got the oil changed. I learned last oil change that it's totally worth the extra $5 to go to Lube 'n Go and wait 20 minutes rather than 2 hours at Walmart.

After that I went to the bank and got some money, but turns out we need more, so I guess I'm going back tomorrow.

I wrangled spots for my kids at church camp and nearly had a stroke when the guy told me that fees had jumped from $65 to $100 per kid this year.

I then called the First National Bank of Granny and asked her if she could help pay part of the kids' way to camp. Then I called the Grammy and Pops Bank and Trust Company and basically offered them my children for chores and odd jobs in exchange for spending money for camp.

I handed my son $20 and sent him into the barber shop where he came out with a flat top. I didn't really think he'd do it. He said he was, but I didn't believe him. He got them when he was little, but hasn't had one in years. Apparently even dudes get tired of their hair, too. Mine is in a perpetual pouf on top of my head these days because I just don't think a flat top would look good on me. Plus, I just spent $80 getting highlights. I'd hate to think I'd wasted that money. Abby now says her brother looks like he had head lice so bad the health department lady had to shave his head.

After the barbershop we went to Walmart where I picked up inordinate amounts of sunscreen and bottled water because, after a lovely, cool, slow-warming Spring, Oklahoma has turned into Oklahell. And have I mentioned we're going to TEXAS on vacation, which is one state closer to Hell? I also bought toothbrush covers because there is a monster that lives in our hall closet that eats those little plastic things. And of course, Abby and I were both completely out of makeup and face soap. Of course, everyone in Ottawa County wears the same shade we do (Corpse) and they were out. I also bought Oreos and Advil because you know that the #1 Rule of Vacation is: At least one female will get her period while on vacation.

After Walmart we stopped at Walgreen's to get the makeup Walmart didn't have and scored it buy one, get one 1/2 off. And I also bought Paul hairspray because he likes to spray it into a hard little shell on his head, much like Jim Bob Duggar does. Abby will walk by the bathroom and see the cloud of hairspray and say, "Dad's in there Jim Bobbin' it again."

Then we flew home to finish cleaning up the house because Abby's boyfriend came over this evening to eat pizza and watch a movie.

I spent the entire time of their "not-a-date" in the dining room typing fast and furiously trying to get reviews, posts, and emails caught up before we leave because I'd like to not have to do more than lift a glass of sweet tea to my lips occasionally while I sit by the pool for pretty much our entire time visiting the great state of Texas. Well, when I'm not visiting with wonderful friends who I miss desperately. And visiting the stockyards. I am excited about this actually. Or it may be the Crazy talking now.

And it's 9:16pm. The house is nearly clean. The laundry is nearly done. The kids are bathed and happily watching AFV. Paul has been to golf and is now home. I am getting ready to take off my bra and get comfortable for the evening.

NOTE: Y'all please pop on over to my review blog, The Redneck Review, and see what I've been up to over there. I've had quite a few posts there lately and have gotten to try out some great products and a really neat website with the kids. Just check it out and make me happy, okay?

And while you're popping over places, visit welchOK.com and make my friend, Tyson, happy, too. And if you click on the OpEd section and then "Diva Dish" you'll make me all kinds of seriously happy. Seriously. And leave a comment. I might wet my pants if you do.