Yesterday I took Ab to the doctor at 7:30 to get her 2nd Gardasil shot. I hope beyond hope that she never needs to protection its giving her.
Jake is missing. He's been gone since Monday. He ran off last spring when he got all twitterpated and came home a week later, skinny, hungry and tired. As he came up the driveway after a week's reproduction vacation we looked like an episode of The Waltons as the kids tackled him, Paul got down off the tractor, I stepped out on the porch, drying my hands on my apron......wait, I don't own an apron. Nevermind. Paul said as he scratched Jake's ears, "If I'd been doing what you've been doing all week, dude, I'd need a few sandwiches and a nap. Good job, bud." We're all still hoping that he's just out giving Bob Barker something to do commercials about, but Paul says for some reason he doesn't think that's the case this time. I am remaining hopeful, but Paul's already calling around for a replacement beagle. I don't know how he thinks you can replace a lab/chow with a beagle, but oh well.
Paul and I spent our morning off together phone shopping. Our phone batteries wouldn't hold a charge anymore and since Paul's phone *gasp* didn't even have a camera or Bluetooth on it we decided it was time to bring him on up to this century. He picked out a Motorola [insert meaningless series of numbers here]. It's nothing fancy, but has Bluetooth capabilities, a camera and can even receive picture messages. He feels like a real pioneer in modern electronics, bless his heart. I picked out a Motorola Rockr, which of course, they did not have in the store that day. However, as I type this, my brand! new! Rockr is sitting at the Radio Shack in Miami with a post-it on it that says "Redneck Diva" and that makes me happy. Okay, so it doesn't really say Redneck Diva. It says "Hoover." I'm waiting on the water heater to finish doing its thing since my asshat husband literally ran down the hall, underwear in hand, to jump in the bathroom before me. He doesn't have new colored hair to fix or make up to put on, but somehow he thought he cleanliness was closer to godliness than mine. Asshat.
I got my hair done yesterday. Story and pictures in upcoming post.
Last night we watched the two-hour Dateline about the Indiana girls whose identities got switched after a horrible car accident. I cried. A lot. I also kissed my kids extra long and decided they are never going to college. Or on dates. Okay, actually I decided that they're never leaving my sight again.
We also watched Enchanted last night. I can honestly say that it is probably one of the best movies I've seen in a very, very long time. I had seen the park song scene on the internet before, but seeing it in the movie last night had me laughing out loud, rewinding it and totally wanting to make a dress out of curtains. You need to click that link right now and watch it so that you, too, will know. And maybe we can make matching curtain dresses.
Tater and I are planning on recording our first webcast sometime today. Details soon - Keep checking back throughout the day!
I was born a semi-diva. I married a redneck. Through the magic of osmosis or just because of a serious lack of sophistication over the years I have found a balance of the two that make me who I am today. And then I write about it all, much to the chagrin of my mother.
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We....the people
Originally published in The Miami News-Record, July 2020 Everything is different now. I’m not just talking about masks and social distancing...
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I am 46 years old. I have been out of high school for 28 years. In 1991, fresh out of the hallowed halls of WHS I took one semester of colle...
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Okay, so the last time I posted I was tired and mad and just generally in a funk. But now the carnival is over and at least that is behind u...
8 comments:
Brady and I both have Rockrs. We heart them.
Have fun!
Hope Jake comes home soon.
I saw that Dateline too. Let's lock up our kids together.
you're so funny. love that you got paul into the 21st century with his new phone.
i haven't seen enchanted yet but now it is on my list of rentals to get.
can't wait for your new hair photos and the WEBCAST!!!! yes!
*pulls up a chair* I will camp out here until the podcast arrives! YAY!!!
I can't wait to see your hair! And your phone!
We saw Enchanted at the theater and Loved It!
What's with all my exclamation points?
!!
I am so proud of you for getting Gardasil for your daughter- I know you don't want to think that she could ever get HPV- so now you will have the peace of mind knowing you did the RIGHT thing for her!
Honestly HPV spreads as fast and as easy as the stomach bug- I hope she never needs the protection but at least you don't have to worry about her dying from cervical cancer in her 30's!
Teddy Bear and I saw Enchanted last night and we were surprised to really enjoy it, too. Yay for the chipmunk!
Just curious... but do they even make cellphones anymore that you can use to make phone calls with? Everyone wants to talk about texting, and picture messages and all that stuff, but nobody ever talks about making phone calls...
best of luck to you with the podcasting, btw.
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