I have waited until the very last possible moment, but I'm finally writing my ode.
Even though I do have IMMUNITY again this week! WAHOO! It sure pays to be insane and write stupid stuff in the Diary Room of the Cyberhouse sometimes.
Without further ado -
Ode to My Toothbrush
Oh toothbrush, sweet toothbrush,
You are chock full of bristle-y goodness
and oh so ergonomically designed.
Not only are you a welcome massage to my gums
But you also keep my teeth from tartar and plaque
when I apply you properly according to ADA guidelines.
Your purple handle lets me know that you are mine
and not my husband's.
I will swap slobber with the man,
but he's wise to never touch you, dear toothbrush,
or place you in his own mouth
for you are mine and mine alone.
I see you sitting there in the toothbrush holder
with ladybugs and flowers adorning it.
I see you there each morning, greeting me
like a good toothbrush should.
Oh toothbrush, how I love thee!
You have kept me cavity-free for two and a half months now
and we still have a half a month to go.
Yes, sweet toothbrush....alas, but your life is but three months long.
It is a sad day when I must replace you with another.
It will again be purple-handled, but I'll always remember you.
Especially when I use you to scrub the grout in the shower.
I was born a semi-diva. I married a redneck. Through the magic of osmosis or just because of a serious lack of sophistication over the years I have found a balance of the two that make me who I am today. And then I write about it all, much to the chagrin of my mother.
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Enjoy that immunity, because just when you start getting comfortable, Big Blogger will yank the rug out from under you and replace you with a sheep on a unicycle.
Bwahaha!
This Is Big Blogger.
Some people would say better late than never. Big Blogger just remembers the pizza was cold when it got here.
Your entry for this week has been noted.
Well Mrs Diva, I will be sure not to accidentaly pick up your toothbrush in the shared bathroom then okay..it is a deal I have to say. I think if the brush is used to clean the grout in the shower as well then the enamel on the teeth will all be gone and soon a person would need false teeth, LOL.
Unless you used my Cool Cleaner, then it'd be okay, it is a debug aswell so no probs with the tooth enamel then.
Hey, my toothbrush is purple handled too!!!
Hillbilly Mom, while I am delighted beyond belief at the immunity that has been my companion these last two weeks, I am nowhere near what I'd consider comfortable. Big Blogger frightens me. I am going to have my task done much earlier this week. I fear what might happen if I don't. Heck, I still fear what might happen even if I do.
Big Blogger, your crypitc message has been duly noted.
But in my defense, cold pizza makes a great breakfast.
Cazzie!!, I meant I would use the toothbrush to clean the grout AFTER it's 3-month lifespan was up!! IEW!
Purple-handled toothbrushes rawk.
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