For those of you who didn't notice the enormous word REDNECK emblazoned at the top of my blog, I am a redneck. Or more accurately, married to one. I'm the diva, he's the redneck. Sadly the redneck is rubbing off on me, but thankfully he's not becoming a diva. Anyway, because obviously the redneck genes are stronger and heartier, we have redneck offspring. Well, one more than the others - my male child. And we're not the only redneck family in the area.
Except something strange is happening these days.
When he sees one of his little guy friends instead of saying, "Hey, Riley" or "Hi, Owen" they all automatically slouch their backs, bend their arms so that their hands hover right around crotch/waist levels and this exchange spews forth from their mouths:
"Yoyoyoyo! Whussup Dawwwwwwwg!"
"Nuttin', homie. 'Sup wichoo?"
And instead of polite, midwestern handshakes - heck, I'd even settle for hugs - they do that clasping of hands thing followed by a manly pat on the back and all of us parents just watch in strange wonder. And I seriously worry that maybe there is an underground gang doing some recruiting in our backwards little town and I worry that their innocence is swiftly fleeting and they'll never be the rednecks we dreamed they'd be.
But then I hear:
"Yoyoyoyo, get this, dawwwwg - my dad got an 8 point buck last night!"
"Suhwweeeeeett! You gonna have it mounted?"
And then I know that it'll all be okay. The redneck genes really are stronger.
I was born a semi-diva. I married a redneck. Through the magic of osmosis or just because of a serious lack of sophistication over the years I have found a balance of the two that make me who I am today. And then I write about it all, much to the chagrin of my mother.
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2 comments:
Wassssuuuppp is highly regarded as an appropriate Hello these days. I try to keep the children from using it, especially on the high school kids. They just encourage them!
Mrs.Coach-It was much funnier on the beer commercial. I don't like hearing my 7 year old say it near as much.
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