Yay. I think I have another kidney stone. It's been 7 years, so I'm not sure. But once you've had one you can never have a backache again without wondering, "Is it? Could it be? Oh hell, please not again."
It started hurting Sunday night when I got in from the Lucky Turtle. Not excruciating by any means. But constant. Walking around it's not bad and I certainly am not debilitated by any means. I've done laundry, cleaned out closets, etc, but when I sit...oh the pain. I look like my son when he's had inside recess at school - he can't sit still, he can only sit on one butt cheek at a time, he fidgets and wiggles, stands up, sits down. That's me right now. I have been on my feet a lot the last few days simply because sitting is horrible.
Part of me thinks (hopes) it's just a strained muscle. A big part of me.
I called my dad, who passes roughly 10 stones a year. I figure he's a pretty reliable source of information regarding the hellacious crystalized stones he and his offspring seem to produce. He said that it sounded to him like a stone that's in the bottom of the kidney, on the verge of dropping into the ureter. Great. That's just what I was hoping he'd say! Sarcasm, read that with sarcasm, people. While it's still in the kidney it's just a dull, throbbing, constant ache. It's when the motherfucker drops into the ureter that it makes you want to die. And quickly.
My last one was a sudden whack upside the back that said "You are dying, go now my child and be with God." No warning, just pain. I was in the ER within 2 hours of the onset. Pretty quick, even though it was two hours of sheer hell.
This one is making the adventure last longer. We're going on 3 days now. IF it's a stone. I'm still holding onto that pulled muscle theory. Mr. Diva just brought me some cranberry juice. I don't know why I torture myself with the cranberry juice thing. It's nasty, makes me thirsty as hell and besides, it's just a pulled muscle. Right? Cranberry juice doesn't help pulled muscles. Right?
I was born a semi-diva. I married a redneck. Through the magic of osmosis or just because of a serious lack of sophistication over the years I have found a balance of the two that make me who I am today. And then I write about it all, much to the chagrin of my mother.
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2 comments:
Oh No! Here's an ailment that I've managed to avoid. The Sugar Beet Baron had them, though. Can you get them blasted?
OUCH! I had kidney stones when I was pregnant with the boy, and that was a bitch! My dad had them all the time, and so they told me that I was going to continue to have them. Thank goodness, knock on wood, that hasn't been the case, but every time I have the pain in my back, it scares the shit out of me.
Hey! I think it is just a pulled muscle, though. (Positive thoughts...positive thoughts...)
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